Author’s Corner: Building Emotion for Conflict

How do you make your reader feel?

At Harpeth Road Press, we look for books with high emotion. By “high emotion,” we don’t mean we want to cry, although that’s fine too! We need to feel. The reader must become invested in the characters and unable to stop reading until they’ve found out what the characters need to be happy and whether they will get it. The main way to achieve this is through conflict.

Conflict is a tricky word in fiction writing. Because it has a slightly different meaning. What’s keeping the characters apart or what’s keeping a character from achieving his/her happiness is conflict. To write it well, you’ll need to convey emotion that builds throughout the book.

Let’s look at an example of conflict as emotion versus fighting with someone:

The scene: Joseph is in love with Ashley, but they’re best friends and he doesn’t want to rock the boat. They’re looking for her lost keys, in a parking lot. She’s about to leave for a trip.

Ashley searched her handbag for her keys. “I didn’t realize they were gone until I got out of the store,” she said, flustered.

As she peered under the car, Joseph focused on the rocks embedded in the pavement to keep his heart from racing at the sight of that adorable way her cheeks flushed when she was nervous. He could stop her this minute, take her by the shoulders, and pour his heart out to her right there in the parking lot. He could finally take the initiative after all these years and tell her that he was hopelessly in love with her.

Her touch on his arm sent a current through is body, his lips parting. Do it. Tell her.

“I guess we’ll have to call a cab,” she said, shaking her head.

“Yeah,” was all that he said.

He ground his teeth together, inwardly scolding himself. She’d be leaving soon and he’d missed yet another opportunity. What was wrong with him? But he knew why. If he told her, he might ruin things forever, and if he lost her, he’d never forgive himself. He’d have to take Alice any way he could get her, and if that was just as friends, he’d have to live with that.

Let’s assess: Where is the emotion in the story? It’s embedded in the action and it’s entirely internal. He never fights with her, but there’s definitely something keeping them apart. What is it? It’s his own fear of ruining things between them. Let’s take a look at where the emotion is.

Ashley searched her handbag for her keys. “I didn’t realize they were gone until I got out of the store,” she said, flustered.

As she peered under the car, Joseph focused on the rocks embedded in the pavement to keep his heart from racing at the sight of that adorable way her cheeks flushed when she was nervous. He could stop her this minute, take her by the shoulders, and pour his heart out to her right there in the parking lot. He could finally take the initiative after all these years and tell her that he was hopelessly in love with her.

Her touch on his arm sent a current through is body, his lips parting. Do it. Tell her.

“I guess we’ll have to call a cab,” she said, shaking her head.

“Yeah,” was all that he said.

He ground his teeth together, inwardly scolding himself. She’d be leaving soon, and he’d missed yet another opportunity. What was wrong with him? But he knew why. If he told her, he might ruin things forever, and if he lost her, he’d never forgive himself. He’d have to take Alice any way he could get her, and if that was just as friends, he’d have to live with that…

By embedding this emotion in the story, the reader feels for Joseph. They know what he’s going through by the author telling what is in his mind and how his body is repsonding, which allows the reader to experience it with him.